Sunday, May 1, 2011

Oh baby!

So as many of you know we are expecting! And since March when we found out I was pregnant I have been keeping a word document with every thing that's been going on. I just haven't been able to post it since we were keeping it a secret from most of you for a little while longer. :) I'm happy to finally be able to start writing my baby experiences on my blog and for all of you to know! I hate keeping secrets! 

Baby Ladle's Story:

Oh baby!

            Summer of 2010 is when it all began…Robby and I were spending another once again blissful evening together, and suddenly the topic of babies came into the picture. I had begun to have strong urges and desires to have a baby, and this wasn’t just some phase I was going through. I knew that our time was coming soon, and that I wanted to start a family sooner than later. Robby wanted to have babies as well, and it was that summer eve in July 2010 that we decided come that fall, we would start trying to have a baby! I can’t even describe the peace and perfectness of that moment. Laying there with Robby deciding we would start our family felt so right. We both felt so good about the decision, and ever since I’ve known it was the right thing for us. Babies were in our future! 

After 3 months we couldn’t contains ourselves any longer (or should we say I couldn’t contain myself any longer). There was so much wonderment going on in my head as to if we could even have a baby. My 2 biggest dreams in life, and fears, have always been to get married and to be able to have children. The thought of not being able to have children with the love of my life terrified me. There was no way of knowing if we could have babies, unless we tried. So try we did!

          October was the first month we tried, and I was SO sure that it was only going to take this one month to get a bun in my oven, after all, my mother was fertile mertile, so why shouldn’t I!? The end of October came, and no baby. So try another month we did!

          November and December came with no luck. I was entirely convinced in December I was pregnant. I would find myself convincing myself I felt different down there, or that I felt nauseated. Never has anyone wanted to be puking and have the signs of pregnancy more than I wanted right then! As the beginning of the year came we decided maybe we should try for more help. We got one of those charts to keep track of your basal temperature. I did it for the month of January, and when no baby came I gave the freak up! After trying for 3 months I concluded we prolly weren’t going to be able to have babies and should just stop caring. The past 3 months had hurt so much with disappointment that I decided I just wasn’t going to care anymore. I was just never going to be able to have my own children…I know…Dramatic right? Luckily I married such a wonderful and positive man who kept me looking in the right direction and would reassure me every month that it would happen. We just needed to give it some time. Robby constantly told me, “We’ll have a baby…Just give it time.” Sometimes I questioned how he could be so sure…And perhaps he knew deep down inside or was given a sign, or maybe he was just trying to make me feel better and be optimistic. Either way I was grateful for his positive outlook on things, and that’s about the only thing that kept me enduring to my hopeful goal for us.

          I had certainly been on birth control for quite some time…Exactly 2 years to be precise, and so I kept trying to tell myself that perhaps my body just needed a little more time to get itself adjusted and in baby producing mode. Without Robby’s positive words every time I hit despair I don’t know what I would have done. I think he knew all along that we would have a baby, and he never doubted it for a second.

          February we finally gave in and decided we’d get some of those ovulation pee-on-stick things to try for a month. I decided this was my last chance of trying to figure out when the freak my body was dropping the blessed egg I needed so badly to get this ball rolling! All of February I peed on those stupid little strips in hopes of finding the magical day. All of February I hoped and prayed with caution still in the back of my head. I wasn’t about to have another month of disappointment and tears, no sir. 

          I knew that my expected period date was going to be February 28th…The very last torturous day of the month! As February 28th rolled around I didn’t start my period. Robby was so sure that I was pregnant. His belief is that a missed period is a baby…But I’d missed my period on 2 accounts before in my life for no apparent reason, so I wasn’t so sure that was the case. 

          March 1st I ran out and got 2 pregnancy tests; I figured IF I was pregnant than it would show that I was pregnant on these little do-dads. I took both tests in the morning with the result “Not pregnant” on both of them. My heart filled with so much disappointment and sorrow. I remember just sitting on our bed crying and looking up towards the Heavens saying, “Why?” If I was so pregnant, how come I wasn’t getting the results I wanted? Robby and I decided that perhaps…Just perhaps I just didn’t have high enough hormone levels to show any results yet…So I agreed to wait a few more days…

          After spending so much money on trying to get pregnant we decided to save a few bucks and get the pregnancy tests that show you little colored strips. We figured if I was pregnant than these would work just as well as the electronic ones…WRONG. After using one on both the 7th and 8th the results just left me skeptical and just as un-sure as I was before. A faint line really didn’t lead my thoughts in a positive direction. Robby was of course confident I was pregnant by this point…No one misses their period AND feels funny down there AND has sore boobs for 2 weeks without being pregnant…Yah hunny…Keep dreaming…I’m NOT pregnant! Deep inside I had a feeling I was pregnant. I was having feelings that I never had before, and of course, my boobs had never hurt this bad for this long ever in my life. In the back of my mind I pretended I was pregnant. I made sure I got tons of water and folic acid in my diet just in case our little somethin’ somethin’ was dieing for some growth and nutrients. 



          The week of March 14th came and I could hardly wait to do another test. This time getting the digital ones again to make sure we were either pregnant or not pregnant. If I got negatives again I swore I was going to lose it, or that I already had. Considering the symptoms I was having there was no way I was mentally sound if I wasn’t pregnant! I took a test on the morning of March 14th…And for once…FINALLY! I got a “Pregnant” PREGNANT…PREGNANT? PREGNANT! I couldn’t believe it…I was pregnant!



          This wasn’t exactly the way I wanted to find out I was pregnant. I had always envisioned getting pregnant, taking 1 test, and then surprising Robby with the news. I envisioned the perfect scenario, and yet ours was far from it. Even though things didn’t quite turn out that way I am so excited to be pregnant! Even through all the exhaustion I am feeling, mood swings, sore boobs, and alterations in my pallet for food I am beyond excited, anxious, and blessed. I feel nothing but peace and happiness in me and cannot wait to bring a baby into the world…into our home…

7 weeks, There's a little somethin' somethin' in there!
Robby said "Give me sassy"...This is sassy haha


March 28th~

After knowing I was pregnant I called the ‘Women’s Clinic’ where I decided I would ultimately be going unless they were just dreadfully mean and rude to me. After figuring out tentatively when I would be at 8 weeks they scheduled me to come in for my first visit. I was SO nervous to go in because let’s face it…I’m not string bean and I was so scared of them taking one look at me and being like, “Um…Why are you pregnant? You are too fat to be pregnant.” Robby kept ensuring me that they would not say anything, and kept re-assuring me that larger woman than myself have had perfectly healthy babies. I was just so scared to go in and get lots of criticism from them regarding my weight and being pregnant. I had desired to lose weight before getting pregnant…But after we started trying to have baby life just kind of got in the way and I never lost the weight. I’m still taking care of my body the best I know how and trying to ensure my baby has all it needs to grow healthy and strong.
March 28th was our first appointment. There wasn’t much to it other than getting a lot of paper-work done and having our first ultrasound! After paper-work was complete we met with an Ultrasound specialist and she did a vaginal ultrasound. I didn’t even know such a thing existed! She checked my uterus and made sure that I had no cists or anything on my ovaries we needed to worry about. I was grateful to see I did actually have 2 ovaries and they seemed to be just fine! For some reason I have always thought I was retarded down in ma baby making parts. So just being able to get a confirmation with a specialist that I look a-ok down there brought such a peace of mind. I know it’s silly, but one can only wonder until someone says, “Yep…You’re normal!” Thank goodness I was normal! 

I remember laying there on the table and finally being able to see our little miracle. It was such a relief also to actually see that I did have something growing inside of me! To be able to lay there and see our baby and see the little heart fluttering was amazing. I just laid there in awe at our little jelly bean :). I can’t wait until we go in again and get to see our little bean and hear it’s heartbeat! I never once took my eyes off the ultrasound machine to see how Robby was reacting to all of this…I was just in such awe at our baby! We’re having a baby! :)

7 weeks and 1 day old!

 

Robby’s 1st appt. thoughts: its here, the long awaited date the date that had been marked on the calendar for about two weeks now. I thought this day would never arrive. We arrived on time and ready to fill out some paper work, paper work that seemed like it took an eternity to fill out. We turned them in and waited anxiously for our turn to be called into the back. Brittany’s name was called and we walked into the back to get an ultrasound. As she dimmed down the lights and turned the monitor on I could hardly wait. Then on the screen there it was this little tiny “thing” an embryo. The specialist then proceeded to point out the yolk sac, the embryo and its tiny flickering heart that was beating about 135 beats per minute. She measured the embryo from top to bottom and determined that it was 7 week 1 day along. I couldn’t believe it after so many months of trying and buying these little ovulation guessing test we had done it we created another human being (or embryo at this point). I couldn’t be any prouder holding our baby’s ultrasound around the doctor office. After all I’m going to be a daddy now! 

After the ultrasound and getting a few glamour shots of our baby we headed down the hall to meet with a nurse and then the doctor. The nurse took my height, weight, and blood pressure and said everything was perfect. I’m sure she only meant that about the blood pressure, but I was grateful to not get an earful about my weight. When the doctor came in he simply said keep doing what I do and try to eat healthy and get some exercise. It was funny when the nurse came in because she congratulated us and then looking at our ultrasound picture she stated, “Ohh you are having a boy…That is a boy for sure.” As the doctor proceeded into the room he glanced at the ultrasound picture as well and stated, “Yep. Looks like a boy!” I simply looked at the little jelly bean like figure and thought, “How can you even tell!” It was funny…The doctor said he’s about 50% right in these things, so I guess we’ll just have to see. :)

After visiting with the doctor for a few minutes, getting some questions answered, and getting some free goodies we headed out to the front desk and were scheduled to come back for a full work-up on April 29th. I’m so excited to get to go back and see our baby again! We should be able to hear the heart beat by then. :)

Telling the In-Laws~

Robby and I had originally wanted to wait to tell everyone until we were out of the 1st trimester, but then we started thinking, ‘If something were to happen, family is going to know one way or another, so we might as well tell them now!’ We had originally wanted to keep everything a secret just in case something bad were to happen, but like I said...Family is going to know either way, and it’d be better if they were in the loop just in case I needed that support if something DID go wrong. Since I would be getting to tell my family in person, we decided it would be fair if Robby’s family knew first! Our original plan was to call the In-laws house during conference weekend; since normally everyone congregates there to listen to conference. Our plan kind of faltered when we discovered Robby’s dad would be out of town and everyone else would practically be in other locations, except for Robby’s mom and sister, Alyse. Sooo on April 2nd after the first session of conference Robby told his mom he needed to talk on Skype to tell them something exciting about his schooling. We wanted to kind of lure away from the actual excitement so Robby came up with the idea of telling them a lie at first…BAD IDEA! Haha. 

We were able to connect with Robby’s mom Annette, Alyse, Kristen, and Lance on Skype. This is kind of how it went down:

Robby: We have something exciting to tell you…
Alyse: BRITTANY’S PREGNANT!
Robby: Well…No…What I was going to say is, I got a internship in Tallahassee!
Everyone on the other line: YAAAA WOOOO WAHOO! (It was even mentioned that Annette became tearful) 

After much hoot and hollering from the other side Robby broke the actual news that I was pregnant. There wasn’t much of a reaction since Robby had already taken them on such a high that the most we got out of them was “Well that is so exciting”. I think with such a rush of excitement at the possibility of us actually moving to Florida something like me being pregnant was kind of engulfed in the other rush of emotion. Initially we didn’t think anyone in Florida was very happy we were having a baby, but perhaps it just took time to sink in that we were actually having a baby…The first grandbaby I might add ;) 

Robby’s Dad was MIA from Florida due to having to go to California for work, so we decided we’d tell him first since he wouldn’t be in Florida to hear. Robby called his Dad and said… 

Robby: So..I just wanted to call you to let you know we won’t be able to make it out for Christmas this year…
Mike: (Paused) Oh?
Robby: Ya we won’t be making it because you’re gonna be a grandpa!

It was really neat to hear Mike’s reaction over the phone, maybe it was just me, but he sounded a little emotional; which is exactly what we were hoping for! It was really neat to sit there and watch Robby tell his Dad he was going to be a Father and his dad a Grandparent. I could feel the emotion and excitement between the two and thought it was pretty neat.
Ultimately I think everyone is happy for us and I’m so excited to bring baby Ladle into the world on November 13th, 2011 (ish). It was really great and such a relief to finally have someone else know! Before telling the Florida family the only people who knew were both Robby and my boss.  It will be even more exciting once everyone finally knows I am pregnant too! But we decided we are going to wait till we’re out of the 1st trimester before the whole world knows Brittany and Robby are pregnant. :)

Tell my Parents~

Since Robby and I had decided to go to California for spring break to get away from Rexburg and for other reasons we decided we’d tell my family then. I am SO grateful I had the opportunity to tell my parents in person and experience that. I’m really not that creative of a person, nor did I want to make telling my parents some big charade or game, so we decided to keep it simple. I knew the first night we arrived that we would all be sitting down to eat dinner together, so I told Robby what we should do is this:

We have one of our ultrasound pictures framed that we brought, and I told Robby and we’re all sitted down eating to go out to the car and get the picture. Then when he came back in he could hand it to my mom and let the rest unfold on its own. Robby handed the ultrasound picture to my mom and I just watched as she looked at it for a few seconds and then smiling she looked at me and said, “ARE YOU SERIOUS!?” She then turned the picture around so everyone else could see it and everyone just hooted. I couldn’t stop smiling and just felt so excited to be able to FINALLY tell my family! I especially wanted my mom to know and I was so happy to be able to tell her. It was fun to see her get so excited. The rest of the dinner conversation consisted of us baby talking of course. :)

April 29th~

After a long awaited month I got to have another Dr. appointment. Waiting a whole month in anticipation of seeing our baby again was finally up! I have been waiting to get to see our baby once again on the ultrasound…It’s one of those much looked forward event. This visit was going to be the big shebang. Consisting of a wonderful pelvic/breast exam, blood work, and of course urine sample. Somehow I survived all that and we got the treat of the ultrasound. We were hoping we would get to hear the baby’s heartbeat…But the Dr. who was with us wasn’t an ultrasound specialist and she said chances are we’ll hear it next time. We were kind of bummed about that, since the first appointment they had informed us we would hear the heartbeat next time. When we first went in and got all situated the Dr. seemed to have a hard time finding the baby. That got Robby and I a tad bit nervous, and considering I could see her face I was really freaked out. She just seemed to look confused, but I’m going to say it was because she’s not a professional ultrasound specialist. Finally she was able to find the baby, I’m guessing she had a hard time because the baby was laying completely flat in my uterus;  like our little bean was playing hide n’ seek or something! It was kind of hard to differentiate what was what and then all of a sudden the baby moved. You could see tiny little limbs and the baby did this kind of jump up and down. I had to actually ask the Dr. if that was the baby moving cause I couldn’t believe it. It was weird to see the baby actually move, there is life in there! I was so happy to get to see our baby and hear that everything was fine. I couldn’t believe how much the baby had grown in 4 weeks! It was finally starting to look like a little person. The Dr. said heartbeat looked strong and great, and everything looked good. I already can’t wait till May 27th in hopes of seeing our baby again.